1. Not to file too fine a point onto David Cameron’s head, but he certainly made a right cock-up of that one didn’t he? A regular old Thomas Hardy he conjured, didn’t he? Here he comes home, having stuck his thumb into the EU pie, felt one or more things round and soft– “a plum!” he thinks, “What a good boy am I!”– and pulls out hard, only to discover that the softs and rounds were his own testicles. Oh, the shock, and pain, of recognition. Fecking brilliant.